is therapy right for you

How to Find the Best Child Therapist.

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How to find the best child therapist.

In the wake of a global pandemic, adolescents are reporting feeling more anxiety and depression than ever before. When your child’s mental health declines, finding the best child therapist is at the top of your priority list. Where do you begin, and what do you look for in a child psychologist or counselor? And how do you know you have found a good one? Read on for help with these questions and more.

As a School Counselor, I regularly help parents find child therapists and psychologists.

As a High School Counselor, I often receive phone calls from parents looking to find child therapists and psychologists to work with their adolescent and young children. Here are the top priorities for finding the best child therapist for your son or daughter:

What type of counselor are you looking for?

For most adolescent and childhood issues, a psychologist, social worker, or mental health counselor can be helpful. If you have explored counseling with little success or if a counselor or primary care doctor suggested medication like anti-depressants, you will need to see a Psychiatrist or Psychiatric Nurse Practitioner. Many child psychologists, social workers, and MHC’s partner with Psychiatrists, so you can go to one practice and see a counselor for therapy and a doctor or NP for medication if needed.

What type of therapy are you looking for?

 If this is your first attempt at getting help for your child, then a child psychologist, social worker, or mental health counselor is a great place to start. Most can use talk therapy, play therapy, and cognitive behavioral therapy with their clients. When you first call to set up an appointment, ask what type of therapy they typically use with a child like yours. Also, ask if they usually work with children with the same presenting issues as your son or daughter. Please do not be shy about asking for their credentials and experience level.

Do they take your insurance?

This element is important because therapy is not an overnight cure for any mental health issue. A genuine effort would require six months to a year commitment of weekly appointments. That can add up very quickly and be difficult to sustain. If you can find a provider who takes your insurance, you will only pay a copay and be much more likely to stick with it long-term.

Do they offer in-person or telehealth appointments?

Telehealth or video conference appointments can make counseling more convenient by removing the hassle of driving to and from appointments. However, it isn’t ideal for initially developing rapport. Creating the necessary trust between therapist and client is best grown in person. Ask if the counselor is available for both in-person and telehealth appointments or only one or the other.

Get Recommendations

If you were looking for a cancer doctor or other specialist, you wouldn’t hesitate to ask friends and neighbors for recommendations. Finding the best child therapist should be treated the same way. In fact, it is even more critical for parents to have a supportive network of other parent friends experiencing similar issues with their children. It would help if you had support too. And I am sure you will find more people than you realize who have used therapy to help themselves or their children.

It is essential to discuss with your child how they feel about starting therapy.

You cannot force counseling on a person as frustrating as this can be. Don’t get me wrong, I am not wholly against coercing or bribing your child to give it a try, but the hard truth is that a person needs to be willing to participate in therapy. Any good child therapist is going to need your child to engage. A talented therapist can build a rapport with a difficult client, but stubborn teens and young children can dig their heels in and refuse simply by not talking or opening up. Allow your child some control over the process to prevent this unfortunate scenario.

Allow your son or daughter to pick the best child therapist or counselor for them.

That doesn’t mean they randomly pick a name out of a hat. You are going to interview them first and provide your child with options. I always suggest to parents and even used this when selecting a therapist for my daughter, that you make appointments with three therapists and allow your child to pick one. Explain the process ahead of time by saying that you want them to feel comfortable with the therapist, and so while you will screen them according to the criteria above, you are giving your child the final choice of who they feel they can connect with.

Lastly, be prepared to participate.

The best way to help your child and model behavior change is to participate in the counseling process with your child. Sometimes, that will look like you are doing a session together, and sometimes, it just means that you have time to conference with their therapist for an update on their sessions. It’s important to remember that a good therapist will honor your child’s confidentiality while involving you in the process. In other words, they should only share with you what you need to know. They should not be reporting back to you with a transcript of everything discussed, and if that is what you are looking for, then parent counseling might be most beneficial to help you cope with your anxiety around your child’s mental health.
We are our children’s first and most prevalent teachers. Taking the first steps to get your child mental health support is courageous and scary for many parents. Please take comfort in the knowledge that you are showing your child how much you value their mental health and are willing to support them in difficult times. That alone is incredibly valuable and an example of true love.
If you have found a great therapist who helped your child, please share your story in the comments below. As well as, if you are beginning this leg of the parenting journey and have questions, please comment. We are your village!

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